Sunday, August 31, 2014
The First Week of School
Monday
The boys started school on Monday the 25th. They were eventually excited about it. Easton is desperate for some friends. Even if his #1 playmate of choice is his own brother, he's always had bunches of friends.
So, Monday morning, the Frau Principal had a "welcome to the school" address at the school's main campus (we do not go to the main campus). Anyway, it was at 9:00 a.m. so the 5 of us headed over there on the subway, Schultüten in hand.
What's a Schultüte?
Schultüten are a fun German tradition. They're "school cones" full of treats for one's first day of school. The true tradition is for your VERY first day of school so the first graders would go parading through the neighborhood on their way to school with these giant knee-to-chin Schultüten as the first day of school is a very big deal. Inside I think you'd typically find various sugary treats and also school supplies like crayons or erasers or what have you. Obviously it wasn't our boys' first ever day of school but it was their first day of school in Germany. Apparently lots of families continue this fun tradition on a smaller scale every year. So, that's what we did. As we don't like to do much sugar, each of their cones had a single, illegal-in-the-United-States Kinder egg, a fun eraser, a pencil sharpener, a mechanical pencil with an added eraser on top, a new Skylanders figure, and some other tiny toys. It is like a Christmas stocking for the first day of school! Anyway, they opened them on our subway ride to school.
Once we got to the school's Aula (auditorium), we listened to Frau Principal's ramblings. Much of her speaking was in German and never translated. But, when she called for the boys' grades to come sit, our boys went and sat. She saw small lil Dalton and told him, "Oh, not yet honey, you're going to start next week" because he is 1st grade sized. He gave me a look and I was like, "Just sit down, you're a second grader" and he did. But for some reason she called every single new student's names which took forever and was confusing. Even "God is Awesome" and "Praise God" were called. Yes, those are actual names she called. As this is a very international place, I can only guess that the name is hard to spell/write/etc in their native language and so that is the translation. Just a guess though, as I have not yet met Praise God or God is Awesome.
Anyway, because of calling everyone's names and trying to figure all the things out, Dalton got a little bored:
But, Easton began making a new friend right off the bat. This friend is from Scotland. Easton kept looking over at us like, "Do you see me? Do you see how I'm already making a friend over here?" Cute. :)
After the very very long assembly. They asked us to take our children over to their actual campus ourselves. It is a 30 minute walk for an adult, so we bid Jason adieu and got on the subway. We were with another small group heading our way as well. There was a mother and 4th grade son who were German but just spent the last 6 years in Shanghai so they spoke fluent German, English, and Chinese. They were also accompanying another 4th grade boy whose parents didn't even come to the assembly and left him to his own devices so the German mother/son took him under their wing. He is from France and his name is the same as a cereal Jason used to eat back home. :) He spoke English with a perfect American accent due to spending 3 years in Michigan.
Eventually we get over to the school and climb up to the classrooms. Dalton's class is on the German 3rd floor/American 4th floor. No lift and remember: ceilings are high in Germany so there is a lot of stairs. A lot. We got Dalton into his class and I parked him next to Easton's Scottish friend's little brother because this little brother was in tears. :( His dad was still there but I wanted Dalton to be friendly so I told him to talk Scottish Crier about Angry Birds because the other kid had them on his shirt. Dalton was fine.
Then we took Easton up to his class on the German 4th floor/American 5th floor. My thighs! Ack! We get there and the teacher I'm giving him to doesn't speak English. At all. At an international Deutsch/English school. Great. So the Scottish family has told Easton and her son to stick together as seemingly the only two non-Deutsch speakers. I'm unable to talk to her about anything including school supplies, etc. Oh well. Easton is fine with me leaving. He knows how to say, "Toilette?" Big boys!
I go to hunt down the school secretary even though she doesn't speak a lick of English either. She's not there. Really? On the first day of school there is no administration or support staff? Not the best choice. Then I hear from someone that we are able to pick up our children several hours early since it's the first day of school. Would have been nice to know that ahead of time. They said we could pick them up at 1:00 but Jason and I were signing the lease contract on the new flat in another part of town at 1:00. It was made clear that there would be care until 4:00 but that we just had the option to get them early. I then went to each boy to let them know that I would not be picking them up early when other kids were leaving so they knew I didn't forget about them. Autumn and I also stopped into the bathroom for our journey across town. It smelled disgusting and the "vestibule" where the sink was in between the hallway and the room with the toilets was pitch black. No lights. No light switches we could find. No window. The toilet room has a window so we were fine in there and then there wasn't any T.P. I got some for Autumn and then helped one of Easton's classmates by holding the door so she could see to get to the toilet room and back out to wash her hands. Ugh, sure hope that the boys' bathroom is better. Speaking of, I decided to make sure Dalton knows where the toilet is. So we went back into his class to get him and show him.
Autumn and I finally left to go meet Jason to sign the contracts, we ate lunch, and then we headed back down to get the boys. They were the only two children left!!! It was maybe 2:30 or 3:00. They were playing on the playground together supervised by teachers but seriously, they were the only two! Oops!
We collected the boys and were on our way home hearing all about the boys' short first day. Easton had to beg to be allowed to get his lunch box at lunch time. They were like, "Why? Why can't you just eat this? Why do you need to go get your lunch?" but they eventually let him. Dalton was elbowed by a bigger boy who didn't want him coming over by the 4th graders. Dalton sort of just took it. :( I hate sending them out into the world for such treatment. It's hard to let go and let them figure out what to do in this great big place.
Tuesday
Second day of school and Dalton's got cold symptoms. Never takes long. This day we had to be at their regular campus at the regular start time: 8:00. Ouch. We have about an hour commute and we did it on a subway and two busses. It was okay enough. It was hard to find which stop for our first bus and then once we did, there was construction happening in front of it so we had to cross the street again to catch it but it worked out and we got to school on time.
Autumn and I then caught a bus route that takes us by touristy places.
We ended up having to "de-bus" at a major train station but we went in and got a Dunkin Donut and then shared a chai Frappacino to remind her that I can still be fun. She had been sad her bubbas were off to school because I am so boring and am "always cleaning or on my computer" according to her. We had a great morning seeing the sights as we got the top front of the double decker bus and then eventually caught a train to Alexanderplatz where our favorite store is. With her birthday two days prior, she had a little money she was wanting to spend so we headed to their toy department and also got a few groceries.
We headed back home to "our" subway stop and stopped for a few more groceries at two different stores and then walked home for lunch and playing for a bit before we went to go check out a KiTa (daycare/what German children do before they are ready for Grundschule). The woman spoke decent English but had thought I was German based on my name and my excellent Google Translated email. :) She wasn't sure she could take on the burden of yet another non-Deutsch-speaking child but she thought Autumn was super awesome and had a "light" in her and said she'd talk to her colleague. That evening I got an email that, when translated, said that Autumn indeed had a "square" at their KiTa if we wanted. I don't. I hope I have other options. :/
Anyway, back to the boys. After we left the KiTa we went to get the boys. Easton had a bit of a rough day. His Scottish friend was absent most of the morning while he was visiting the doctor. He ate lunch by himself because the tables were all full and he was saving a seat for his brother (who never came but they had eaten together the day before). He was having tummy troubles as he can be a bit anxious like his mama and had to run in to quickly take care of some surprise business. When he was done, there was no soap in the bathroom he was in. So he climbed 3 flights of stairs to get to one that did have soap. It broke my heart hearing about his day but he was relatively fine with it and still happy to go back.
Wednesday
We tried to do our same bus trick again but we got on a bus going the wrong direction at first. I caught it immediately (this time) and I changed the plan on the fly and so we went to a different subway to catch it. Buuuuuuuuuuuut, that subway line was down. Great. I can't understand the overhead announcements in Deutsch and I had no idea what was happening and why we all had to disembark. It turned into this big mess and the boys ended up being an hour late to school.
Later when we picked the boys up I learned that they didn't blow (or Easton didn't hear) the whistle to come inside at recess. So Easton was left outside. Eventually he realized his class was not there and went in to join his class again (who was not in the classroom). Lovely. They lost my kid for a bit. Anyway, the kids and I headed over to the main campus for an extra curriculars fair. Basically all the offerings had booths and you were able to find out more. They have some that take place during school hours and some right after school. None of those ones were offered at the boys' campus, however, and it would be my responsibility to somehow get them over there and, well, it was stupid.
We went home and as soon as Jason arrived I had to turn right back around and go back to the kids' school for a meeting with Dalton's class parents and teachers. I was going to try yet another route to get there but, gah!, another subway line was suddenly down and I had to reroute and ended up a few minutes late to the meeting. We learned about their schedule, about how we need to give money so they can buy a computer (there is not a single one in the building), about how the 140 euros we paid for books will eventually get us books, blah blah blah. It ended a little after 9:00 p.m. and I had my journey home.
Thursday
We got to school the way I had tried to go last night. At the stop where we changed subways, we ran into another mom and son from Dalton's class and rode and walked the rest of the way in with them. That was fun. I forget where the woman was from but I know her husband was Japanese and they spoke that and English and probably something else.
I deposited the boys in their classrooms and then some of the parents were in the halls being like, "Are you coming to the meeting today at 3:00 before we pick up the kids?" and I was like, "Oh I didn't get the message" and they're like, "no no, it's us parents needing to have a meeting about some of the things going on here" and I was all, "Oh, okay, what am I supposed to be mad about?" and I kid you not, it is like WCS Part Zwei. WCS is the school we were at before we began homeschooling the boys last year. It was seriously the exact same stuff: security issues, cleanliness issues, poor communication, lack of organization, feeling misled about what the school wants to do vs. what they are actually doing. I felt a little sick, honestly. Like, I was feeling all of these things, however, I know for a fact that school security here in Germany is just not the same as we expect in America. But also, people can't just get guns here. Children younger than Easton ride the subways by themselves all over town. It's just different here and I was thinking I would just have to change my thinking that school buildings aren't secure. I was surprised to see that all these international parents are just as up in arms about some of the issues we had at our American school, to be honest.
A woman who just moved back here from England began talking with me and Autumn and said she knew of a KiTa I should talk to. She gave me the number and then she was like, "You know what? It's five minutes away, I'll take you there, I've been meaning to stop by and see my friend anyway." So . . . (car seat people plug your ears...er, cover your eyes...) she put me in the front seat of her British car (so we were on the left) and Autumn was on my lap! Ack!!! But anyway, she took us to check out a KiTa which is full and also is only English speaking, neither of which is going to work for us but oh well, it was nice to start getting to know yet another friend.
So after the KiTa, Autumn and I spent the day meeting up with another new friend and then we went over to the school for the parent's airing of grievances at 3:00. On our way in, I saw Dalton on the playground near the fence and he noticed us. He told me, "My teacher told me I can't bring lunch from home anymore, I have to eat what they have here." And I was thinking, "Gosh, I sure hope he misunderstood" and told him I'd pick him up after our meeting. We headed into the Mensa and I was the only American in this particular group. In fact, I was the only North American even. But the meeting was in English and we all shared and what not. Someone brought up a Facebook group possibility and sooooo many of these people are not on Facebook. Especially not the Germans. Anyway, on a show of hands of who was on Facebook, when I raised mine I heard an all-in-fun "of course she is, she's an American" jest. :) One German man explained to me that this anti-sharing everything about your life on Facebook is a fairly common German attitude. Fair enough.
Anyway, we had the meeting and then picked up the kids. Dalton's teacher told me, "Yes, about the lunch, we are trying to have the kids eat all the same thing". Based on my face she added a few things about 'unless he is very fussy' and I was like, "Uh...yeah. Dalton throws up if something bothers him." He gags watching other people eat their yucky-textured food, good luck. Plus, I don't want to have to pay for this food my kids will not eat. They won't. I asked them. They are disgusted with the idea. Well, after that conversation she then tells me about my older son being upset at lunch. What? Just then Easton comes in and yep, I can tell he is super uncomfortable but putting on his best nonchalant face (and failing miserably). I don't make him tell me about it then in front of anyone but eventually he tells me that they wouldn't let him get his lunch box today. They weren't exactly denying him food, because he was welcome to get the "hot lunch" but he took a look and didn't want any of the "disgusting lumpy green soup". So, apparently they changed the schedule on him and he didn't know they wouldn't be coming back to their classroom before lunch. If he had known, he would have brought his lunch box outside. I know he would have. But they came in and went straight to the Mensa to eat and when he asked to go get his lunch box, the teacher told him no. So he stood--starving--against the cafeteria wall and had to wait for everyone to finish their lunches and recess before they all went upstairs and he could eat what we'd packed. He was miserable. They don't eat till 1:30 so he had to wait till well after that. Yes, they have a morning snack and I pack a fairly substantial one, but he ate his less substantial afternoon snack in the morning by mistake so he was hungry. He was trying hard not to cry because he's in 4th grade and all but he was so upset. :( Breaks my heart. Apparently my children and one other are the only "weirdos" that bring their lunch. The parents were actually making it sound like it's the law here: that everyone pays for and eats the form lunch. If we're vegetarian, they have to accommodate that, but it sounds like we're really not supposed to be sending lunches which blows my mind. At our previous school, most kids had packed lunches from home. Don't I have the right to feed my children what we want them to have???
In talking with Dalton's teacher, it sounds like I can continue to send lunch for both boys but I have to send Easton's with Dalton so it's downstairs already or something? I don't know. It's confusing but I shall do my best and hope that people above this teacher don't change things on us. My poor hungry boy. That would never happen in America. I think my sweet children are also worried about how they don't have any money on themselves to pay for this lunch. They don't know that I would get billed or set up an account with the kitchen. It's like the first time I flew as an unaccompanied minor on an airplane with my sister: I didn't know the food was included. I looked in my purse...my puffy, hot pink purse with hearts all over it, and I had enough money to buy a dinner for her. I remember the stewardess bringing the trays and me asking her how much it cost. Awww. Anyway, I feel like that probably worries my boys too. Like, "I can't eat this lunch, it looks gross, my parents are picky about what goes in our bodies, and I don't have money." :(
I also learned that a boy was throwing balls at Easton when Easton was in a tree. He said, "He used to be my friend but I guess maybe he was never really my friend". :( Dalton said, "He's a foe."
Friday
Thank the Lord that Fridays are short days. I can pick them up before lunch. Hooray! So, I didn't even have to pack a lunch in the morning. However, at school the parents were standing around gossiping and I heard from more than one parent that they'd heard about Easton being upset and denied his lunch box. Great. Kids are going home and telling their parents. I hate that Easton is now infamous for this. Enough where they go home and tell their parents. One mom said her son offered to the teacher to go with Easton, though, like, "if he can't go by himself to get his lunch, maybe I could go with him?" and the teacher still said no. But isn't that so sweet?
Autumn and I spent the morning with our friends and then they came with us to pick up the boys from their school. Good thing too as she is listed as one of our emergency contacts since they won't even take down my American number to call. :) We picked up the boys who had much better days and I felt a little better going into the weekend with a good day under our belts. The kids are handling this fine, they're not hating school, they actually don't mind going, even with some of these issues. Easton is really enjoying learning about the Aztecs and Dalton is desperate to start learning anything. He hates how slow things go in the first weeks of school. The first graders had their big ceremonies all over Berlin on Saturday (we didn't go, Dalton said, "I think I might sit this one out" when we asked if he wanted to go (as a 2nd grader) to this welcoming ceremony. But, that means the first graders will be joining the 2nd graders in their combined class starting tomorrow and hopefully things will start getting figured out.
I'm anxious to hear all the latest from the "parents-with-problems". I'm hoping for a smoother week with balancing sleep and chores and family time. Smoother commuting, better meal planning. We haven't been in this sort of a routine since we pulled them out of public school in early February. We're all adjusting again! And before, I was able to take them to school in my p.j.'s., unshowered with no makeup. The kids always ate breakfast on plates in the car and I'd have my travel mug of coffee. None of that happens anymore when you have to take a subway. Still getting used to our new normal but I'd really appreciate some prayers for my boys as they navigate a new week of school.
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Oh my gosh, my heart hurt the entire time I read that. I am so sorry that your boys are dealing with so many changes in a foreign environment. I honestly don't think I could do it. I think I would be sick to my stomach all day while they were at school and then cry myself to sleep at night. Prayers headed your way!!
ReplyDeleteHUGS! Kristan, you are being such a trooper about these major changes. It really is amazingly encouraging to hear how you are all transitioning. Prayers, truly, that the boys have a better second week.
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